The wooden trough lived in the bottom kitchen cabinet, the one to the left of the sink. It stuck sometimes, requiring a hip check. Stocked with a heavy blanket of flour, the trough served as the base of all things biscuit. Mom retrieved it from its shelf, bumped the door closed, and began the process with a clump of lard and a pond of buttermilk. She used her hand to swirl the ingredients until they coagulated into dough. I stood beside her on a metal step stool holding my faithful stuffed companion, Winnie the Pooh.

My family has big hands – short digits, broad knuckles. They are the hands of working people, cow milkers and row hoers. I watched Mom’s strong-boned, olive toned hands work magic in flower beds and French braids, but they seemed most at home in flour. A small square diamond and thin gold wedding band adorned her unpolished nails, buffed, and filed into crescent moons.

When the dough consistency satisfied her, she shaped the biscuits onto a greased pan. She didn’t roll or cut them, she molded them – more potter than baker. When the pan was full, the remaining dough was placed onto a small metal disc. We called this coveted, ameba-shaped extra biscuit, “cakey bread.” While it came from the same dough trough, it was special because it was separated out from the others, and it had its own original name.

From the stool advantage, I attempted to reserve the cakey bread for myself. The youngest child learns to act early and often to secure desirables ahead of siblings. “We’ll see,” answered Mom, which translated to, unlikely.

Mom’s biscuits were bronzed on bottom, fluffy clouds on top, taller and more well done than Granny’s, which were lighter in color and texture and robust in density. While I liked Mom’s biscuits, I loved Granny’s. Out of guilt or maybe to ratchet Mom down a notch, I confessed my biscuit ranking.

Granny, #1. Mom, #2.

“Suit yourself,” Mom replied, unphased. “I liked Grandma Needham’s biscuits better than my own Mama’s too.” My four-year-old brain churned with curiosity branding this exchange into my subconscious. Suit yourself? What the tarnation?

Later I would learn to identify this inherent struggle for originality between parent and offspring from my own children and remember that most trails have wagon ruts. Deep runs the desire to fit in with sameness and stretch out with difference.

I was raised in the south, so I’m capable of making biscuits and they score a solid okay, but they miss heart. It’s scientific as I have to follow the recipe on the flour bag and once measuring cups and puny half pint containers of buttermilk enter the equation, the biscuit gods know they are dealing with a poser. I’m not writing this for sympathy. I’m at peace with this mediocre skill set.

I have a Smokin’ Hot Love Biscuit and a dog named Toast, so I pay homage to my love of carbs in other ways.

At the end of my arms are the hands of my family. My skin is olive, my fingers stumpy. The hands of a worker bee. I’m more at home on a computer keyboard than in a dough trough, but that doesn’t mean that I don’t think about the impressions that were baked into me. Somehow with age, there’s a yearning to draw back to that which no longer exists in earthly form. I wonder how Mom would feel knowing that when biscuiting, I use the frozen variety. If I could ask her about technique now, I suspect she would say I should have paid more attention when I was watching her or maybe she would laugh and put Granny on the heaven phone line since I liked hers better. Perhaps she would employ a phrase common to my kinfolk about my store-bought biscuits, “More money than sense.” All these answers are applicable. Touché, afterworld. Touché.

While I’m a product of my parents, I’m different. In some ways this is better, in others, not so much. The world has evolved, demanding changes and I have grown into my own person. I am grateful for the foundation they established and the encouragement to be my own architect. Just like me, they were first timers at this business of living when they walked the earth and rotated the sun.

 

A few months back, Riley, Ryann, and I were away together for a weekend. Over dinner and adult beverages, they started revealing things they did in younger years that I didn’t know about. Some I suspected; some I didn’t. I nodded and sipped my Cabernet, knowing that I did my best as their mom and that I love them both completely for the ways in which we are the same and different – yesterday, today, and tomorrow.

With cleansing breaths, I acknowledged and released their secrets. In many instances, I laughed. Until … they professed their intense, undying love for, ahem, Instant Mashed Potatoes. Geez, just when I thought I raised decent humans. How lazy can one’s children be that they resort to faking a potato?

“That does it,” I said. “I’m re-writing the will.”

No frozen biscuits for you.